Tuesday, September 30, 2008

This time last year

I was beginning the labor process. My uncle passed away exactly a year ago Sunday and my family was making plans to travel up for the funeral. I knew I wasn't going, but being I had 3 weeks to go, Jay was going to go up for the visitation and the funeral with my sisters. It was a Sunday and I felt weird. I couldn't quite pin point it and I swore there was no way it was labor. I spent the day cleaning the house and sleeping. I was in denial. I told Jay that I thought it was a good idea if he didn't leave me cause all I thought about was everyone who was important to me was going to be four hours away and that I would have the girls here with me and go into full blown labor. And with my history of QUICK births, I knew no one would make it in time.

I remember very vividly my mom calling me at 12:03 pm on Friday September 28. I knew if she was calling so early in the day, it must not be good news. My favorite uncle, my Godfather, had lost his battle with cancer. We had found out right about the time that we announced we were pregnant with Cecelia. Now, at 37 weeks my mom was calling to tell me he was gone. She knew earlier in the morning, but was afraid to call me. She figured with all the stress, I would put myself into labor. I suppose she is pretty smart afterall. I cried and cried. I felt bad because I knew I wasn't going to be able to say a proper farewell. I had wrote him a note before he passed (only a week before) and told him if our baby was a boy, he was going to have his name as his middle name.

So a year ago this very moment, I was mourning the death of my uncle and preparing to meet the newest addition to our family. Though I still remember thinking that this wasn't it. It just couldn't be. Boy was I WRONG!

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I remember the trials of this situation for you. Death is never easy, even years later. ((hugs))

Kim Cervone said...

That entry made me think of the bible passage (and subsequent Beatles song) that there is a time for every purpose. A time to be born and a time to die. I'm sure your uncle would be at peace to know that Cecelia helped you all get through your mourning. xo